Lightwatcher Diary – May 19th 2022 – Using Prism to Help Light Sensitivity

  1. Top of Head
  2. Forehead
  3. Eyes
  4. Throat
  5. Heart
  6. U Abdomen
  7. L Abdomen
  8. V L Abdomen
  9. Upper Legs
  10. Lower Legs
  11. Feet
  • Violet
  • Indigo
  • Dark Blue
  • Light Blue
  • Green
  • Yellow
  • Orange
  • Orange Red
  • Light Red
  • Dark Red
  • V Dark Red
  • Intuition
  • Purpose
  • Analytical
  • Voice
  • Feeling
  • Power
  • Nurturing
  • Vulnerability
  • Belonging
  • Grounding
  • Rooted
  • Vibrant +
  • Vibrant +
  • Mid
  • Vibrant
  • Vibrant
  • Vibrant
  • Vibrant
  • Vibrant +
  • Vibrant +
  • Vibrant+
  • Vibrant

(Low + I see energy not moving Vibrant + I see energy chaotic and not settled)

Weather: Sun and Some White Cloud

Hi, Please listen to my audio diary today.

Please follow me and you will see the up and downs of my energy patterns through the year and how I have learnt to thrive, no matter the weather, no matter the light! You will find all my previous entries on my ‘Lightwatcher Diary’ page.

If you understand your state, then you can understand your needs. If you understand your needs, then you can fully live your life.

Jennie

The Emotional Psychological Connections of Optics

We need direction to use power. We need power to use direction

Our experience of power in life can be affected by astigmatism

Our experience of direction in life can be affected by Strabismus (squint)

Neither always show themselves in the darkness of the optician’s room. If you are sensitive or suspect processing issues, ask to get checked in the daylight.

How I Work as a Healing Intuitive

When I look at children and adults I don’t just see their physical body, clothing etc. I see people’s energy patterns – where a person is low in energy (revealing disconnection at a deep level) and where a person has stuck energy (revealing a person’s conflict with an aspect of themselves). I also see where a person’s energy is healthy and vibrant. By understanding the reason for disconnecting, we are able to start making connection again by healing and making the right choices for ourselves. By understanding the reason for conflict we are able to resolve the battle within ourselves and start to live a more calm and harmonious life.

I see the relationship that a person has with their: –

  • Intuition
  • Purpose
  • Analytical / Logical Thought
  • Voice
  • Feelings of emotional connection
  • Power / Big feelings
  • Nurturing and being Nurtured
  • Vulnerability
  • Sense of Belonging
  • Sense of Being Grounded
  • Sense of Being Rooted

What Happens in a Session?

You Sense

I help you tune into your inner wisdom and intuition. Lying down or sitting, I take you on a journey through the different areas of your body, asking you how it feels to be a particular part of your body. You may sense that an area feels strong, weak, stuck, empty, tingly, hot, cold or just feel a symptom that you are already familiar with.

I sense

Having asked you to sense your own energy, I will then tell you what I ‘see’ in each area. I ‘see’ where people’s energy is vibrant and also discern imbalances (stuck and low energy). Sometimes I use touch as extra confirmation of what I ‘see’. Sometimes I ‘hear’ and sometimes I ‘feel’ information.

We record

Together we will then fill in a person outline chart (on screen) which will give you the information you need to understand yourself and your needs better.

We unfold

If it becomes clear that you need healing, I will offer it to you. In a body centred client led session I intuitively help you unravel the story that is behind any issues we have discovered. As you connect with your story and I hear you, you will be able to let go of past unhealthy thought and emotion patterns. I then help you to learn how to adopt more healthy patterns, play around with them in your daily life and eventually make them your own.

We nourish

Alternatively or in addition, I give you suggestions to help you learn how to conserve, nourish and express your energy in the best way possible, to give you the most complete feeling of wellbeing.

Even though I encourage you to help yourself, I remain available for help and support along the way. Healing is a journey best taken one step at a time!

Children and Teenagers

I help children and teenagers understand their energy as a way to keep in touch with their feelings and needs. By energy I just mean life-force; something we all know is there really  but just can’t see! My sessions with children give practical and helpful advise so they can feel better about themselves and find where they fit in the world. I help children and teenagers with trauma if they have trauma. I help children and teenagers to find their voice if they have lost it or never found it. Or maybe you have a highly sensitive child who is struggling to live in the world. I help with that too. A parent / guardian will need to be present in all sessions. I offer a free 20 minute chat by phone, skype or zoom to see if we would be a good fit to work with each other.

What I Charge:

I charge:-

£40 per hour session 

Location:

I work from my home in Crewkerne, Somerset. It is in a peaceful location off a quiet side-road.  If you are driving, parking is secure on our drive. if you are using the bus it is approximately 500 yards from the bus stop

Space:

I use a quiet, light, airy, comfortable room (no stairs). We are able to work 3 metres apart if required. We have a pet free, smoke free home. Between sessions I wipe down all surfaces used with antibacterial wipes. Due to my sensitivities I am not able to wear a mask but you are welcome to wear one if it makes you feel more comfortable. If you have any special needs, please let me know and I will do my best to meet them.

Spectral Sensitivity – Can I See Auras?

When it comes to seeing coloured halos of light around people – I don’t see those.

However I have a sense of how someone is connected in each area of themselves so you could say that I am aware of a person’s auric field. I see and sense how much a person is connected with their: –

  • Intuition
  • Purpose
  • Analytical / Logical Thought
  • Voice
  • Feelings of emotional connection
  • Power / Big feelings
  • Nurturing
  • Vulnerability
  • Belonging
  • Groundedness
  • Rootedness

I see a person who is strong in their intuition and purpose as less present in their body than the person strong in their heart and their legs. I see this changing according to a person’s pattern and the seasons. I say that I feel more ethereal and see others as more ethereal when there is more blue light. I say that I feel more physically present and see others as more physically present when there is more red light.

The challenge of being more ethereal is that we feel less physically strong than other people. We have less physical resilience. I wanted to be a busy mum, working, looking after my family and socialising in the community. However I am more of an ethereal person, with a high capacity to process high frequencies and low capacity to process low ones. I have to choose a different lifestyle where I allow myself to use my intuition more and be less concerned about my practical contribution to the world.

However I make sure I stay in touch with all areas of myself as best I can. I don’t want to be so heavenly minded that I am of no earthly use! I have been accused of this. I am settling now for being very heavenly minded and just enough earthly use to feel connected with myself and the world!

I believe that not honouring your pattern, especially if you tend to be more on the ethereal side, can be the cause of chronic fatigue, depression, anxiety and other dis-ease.

Honouring your spectral pattern or living according to the pattern of your auric field is the way to freedom, happiness, good health and fulfilment. Please follow my diary to keep in touch with all my developments and give you ideas of how you can work with your own pattern and relationship with the light. If you would like help, please check out the info on my tab ‘Your Spectral Pattern‘.

My Spectral Sensitivity Story

Young Childhood and Primary School

As a child I often had stomach aches, felt allergic to foods, had hay fever and felt ‘not safe’ in the world. When it comes to my sensitivity to colour, I remember being given my sister’s pass-me-downs, and because they didn’t yet fit me, they were stored in a wardrobe. I sometimes spotted something I really liked and couldn’t wait to wear it, but by the time I could wear it (several months later), it seemed to have changed colour and I would say that I don’t like it any more. I was also a very unpredictable and picky eater. I would always really dislike seeing a meal on the plate and couldn’t stand going to a restaurant where the plates were bigger. I would just burst into tears at the sight of the large oval plate. Sometimes I liked things and sometimes I didn’t. When questioned about it, my siblings would knowingly say “It’s Friday today. Jennie doesn’t eat peas on Friday!”. I just about managed primary school because I like learning and found the learning possible, but found all the times when we were all together – in the playground, assemblies etc. – made me very anxious.

Secondary School

I remember finding September, when I started school each year, feeling like a very strange month. The colours and patterns of trees and leaves and grass all felt strange. By the time I had cycled the 2 miles to school I felt even worse. I couldn’t face assembly so used to take ages to walk to school with my bicycle, so I missed it every Tuesday. I felt anxious all the time at school and struggled with the learning. Things weren’t in nice neat boxes any more like they were in primary school. There were too many letters and numbers on the blackboard and not enough light. There were too many complicated concepts and no-one to put them in order for me. I used to feel that I just had to get out of the classroom and at 14, was diagnosed with agoraphobia. I would go into the playground but would feel no better. I would go into the cloakroom and wrap myself in the coats and hug a heater until I felt better. I often went to the place my mother worked when I couldn’t manage school. She was a laboratory assistant in another school. I would sit in her nice light office and she would give me jobs to do. I remember being given hundreds of tiny white cubes to count and sort. I found this deeply comforting. Little did we know then that this was helping me to re-organise my brain.

After this . . .

I would say I became a bit of a shadow of myself, never knowing when the anxiety would be present. I took O levels, A Levels and went to College. I’m not sure how I managed those years. Maybe the environments were a little better for me and also I was choosing to study.

Adulthood

As soon as I went into the big wide world, anxiety hit again. I was a primary school teacher now and just couldn’t keep everything in my head that I needed to be there. And there were too many children and too much clutter! I only managed this for a year. By my mid 20’s I was suffering with symptoms that felt like burn-out. At 29 I married and by 31, I had a virus that led to post viral fatigue and I had this for 6 years. I got myself better from this and back to what I felt was full health. At 39 I gave birth to our son, Luca. When Luca was one I was diagnosed with Hashimotos (swinging thyroid condition). A few years later I was told this had corrected itself (based on blood tests.)

Next . . .

I just got on with life as best I could, now working as a one-to-one music teacher. I still had about 10 mild symptoms that I didn’t understand.

Then in May 2017 (when I was 49) I found a bookmark on my computer for Irlen Syndrome. I had a look at it and thought maybe it might explain my extreme light sensitivity. I arranged for a diagnostic. When the lady came and gave me all these different coloured tints to try, it was a real challenge for me. I only had to pick up some pairs and lift them up towards my face, to know that they were wrong. I could feel strange sensations in my arms and my head. Sometimes the diagnostician would notice that I would actually move the glasses physically to one side of me, without me realizing. Then trying the glasses with my eyes closed I would say all sort of things:-

“These make me feel like my eyes are tightly stuck closed”

“These make me feel like I can open my eyes.”

“These make me feel like I can breathe better”

“These make me feel that I have more contact with my feet.”

“These make me feel taller,”  

“I can’t even bear to look at the colour of these.”

When we found a pair that felt right, I felt amazing. I could see things in an integrated way for practically the first time. My binocular vision seemed to be working perfectly. And no lines were jumping out at me. Everything was just soft and I felt soft. I felt taller and stronger and more integrated. Things didn’t seem so far away. I remember noticing that I went right up to things like the work surface in the kitchen. Things seemed in line with each other. Even places, like the corner shop, didn’t seem so far away.

One thing was strange though. I remember saying “But green still doesn’t look right through these glasses.” And that was really when the penny dropped about my relationship with colour. I realised that focusing on colours didn’t feel right to me, contributing to my unexplained nervous system symptoms.

I ordered my glasses and when I collected them 2 weeks later, they had the same wonderful integrating effect. But 2 days after this they stopped working. I thought the light was getting in the sides so stuck on pieces of cardboard, but it didn’t help. The spectrum had changed in my perception. I went on to have another 2 Iren diagnostics that year and had 2 more pairs of glasses, but the same thing happened. They quickly stopped working.

I still have multiple symptoms every day. They range from mild to not so mild. I move from feeling that I am struggling to function, to feeling able to engage and connect in some way that makes me happy. I find it has become easier to help myself with my issue with colour. I live in a neutral house and wear colours that match the light in the moment. I use tinted glasses and lighting to help me. I find my difficulty with pattern is much harder to work with, though. Outside, how I see leaves and blades of grass, and the outlines of branches on the sky all feel disturbing to my nervous system. Inside, how I see piles on carpets, the relationship between furniture on walls, creases in curtains, patterns in wood and vinyl floors etc are all disturbing to my nervous system. It seems that it is not just about focus because I can wear prescription glasses to make my focus feel pretty good. It is as if sometimes lines stand out too much. Sometimes, it is as if I have tuned the TV into HD and then gone up a setting from there. At other times things seem to blend too much and it is as if I can’t tune in HD at all. I started to call my experience of colour ‘general tonal discord’

A Revelation

In 2019, one of my music students mentioned a physiotherapist who he found very helpful. In fact he called him a healer. My ears pricked up and I felt that I should meet this man. I booked an appointment for March 2020 but of course with the pandemic at the time, I didn’t make that appointment. In fact we didn’t get to meet in person until one very cold December day in his physiotherapy room on the Dorset coast in 2021. This meeting changed my life because someone finally recognised the challenges of being me, but also my gifts. And he discerned that my difficultes were a result of the conflict between my challenges and gifts. I hadn’t accepted either. I am still on the journey . . .

Why Don’t Some Children Want to Wear Clothes or Eat Food?

When children say that they don’t want to wear something or eat something, it is not a disorder. It is a gift. They are basically saying that the piece of clothing that we are asking them to wear, or the food we are asking them to eat are not a match for their deeper selves in that moment.

Your child is likely picking up information about their environment that you as the parent may just not perceive. They may know that the light is slightly more blue today and so they shouldn’t wear a deep blue dress. They may know that the light is slightly more red today so the pink top they wore yesterday will overpower them. They may know that the light feels a little more blue today and that means they can only eat crunchy food and they won’t like scratchy textures or harsh sounds. They may know that the light feels a little more red today and they need something soft on their plate and would like something soft to cuddle.

What your child has is a gift to detect the subtle changes in energy inside them and all around them because they detect subtle changes in the light spectrum. If they are given the support to hone their gift, they will be able to use it to nourish themselves and make themselves and others feel good. Without the right kind of support and by medicating the problem, their gift could be lost to the world for ever.

Why My Son Likes Cities

How I see the spectrum often makes me feel that I am watching TV in HD and then someone has turned the setting up one notch further. I feel that the branches on the sky are a little more pronounced than is comfortable and all of my 3D perception is very subtly altered.

My perception of sound is also altered meaning that sounds stand out more than is comfortable. I am constantly aware of every sound around me. This means the world can feel a bit harsh or stark. I tend to prefer to be in places where there is less clutter and less intrusive sound. Struggling to process movement also adds to my difficulty with being in busy places. And I struggle to engage with practical activities such as cooking.

Now my fourteen year old son is different to me. It seems that he may have the experience of waching TV in low definition. Things aren’t unclear or fuzzy but they seem to be more blended. He doesn’t like clothes with tags on because he says they look tatty. He worried that he had wrecked our plastic kitchen chair when he dropped some raspberry on it from his apple and raspberry crumble. He can’t seem to see stains as separate from the object that they are staining. He is distressed by a spot of blood on anything. He checks all our cutlery for marks before eating his lunch. He struggles to engage with practical tasks such as spreading pate on his crackers.

My son’s perception of sound is also altered. He is fine with mechanical sounds like a spinning washing machine but really struggles with speech and can’t tolerate one note of singing. I wonder if sounds are too blended for him. He is happy listening to a YouTuber who has removed all the gaps in his speech so sounds like he hardly takes breath! He doesn’t struggle to process movement. He likes it. He thrives on having buzz around him as long as he doesn’t need to engage with it practically.

I am much more likely to be over-stimulated. My son is much more likely to be under-stimulated.

And this is why my son loves cities! Well, for a short burst of time anyway!

Oh Yippee – I am Connected!

I have spectral sensitivity and it is October. My serotonin is low. I eat chocolate truffles between all meals and need a bath when I have come in from being outside. And when I am outside I feel as if I am in a dream. I am fussy with food textures and even my softest bamboo clothes feel scratchy to me. I sometimes don’t want a hug. I am losing tones in colour and this particularly causes me to find food and faces difficult to look at. My sound sensitivity is at its peak and when people talk to me, I need to ask them to use fewer words. My movement sensitivity is at its peak. When people are excited around me, I need to ask them not to use their arms.

I have been making observations about my spectral sensitivity for 4 years now and this is the first autumn when I can honestly say that despite all my challenges, I am happy. I finally realise that I don’t need to connect in any particular way – I just am connected. I don’t have to connect through what I see, feel, touch, hear – I can tap into a deeper connection.

I was brought up from a young age to go to church. We we far from the perfect family and I am pretty sure my Dad just went because he liked the music. It was an experience for me though. It just happened to be a beautiful round church – one of the few in the country. I liked round things! And my parents bought me a service booklet for children with pictures. And how I loved this booklet! I don’t go to church now but I do carry my faith around with me and it is the place I go to when I have lost all my other ways to connect. When I feel at odds with myself and the world, my faith warms my heart and puts a smile on my face. 😊

When the Red Tones are Missing . . .

I often see too much blue and not enough red. When red tones are missing, nothing feels complete.

When I went back to school as a child the trees were losing their leaves and they didn’t feel compete.

The pumpkin of October didn’t feel complete and even less so with holes in.

The flames dancing around on the fire in November hurt my eyes and didn’t feel complete.

The presents and tree of Christmas didn’t feel complete. The colours and patterns of my clothes didn’t feel complete.

The colours, shapes and patterns of the food on my plate didn’t feel complete.

People’s voices, music, the sound of a bath tap didn’t feel complete.

A hug or a kind word didn’t feel complete.

Nothing felt complete until New Year when there was a bit more blue and red light and my hope of completion started to rise. By Easter things were feeling better and by my Birthday in May I could process the patterns on my new Birthday cardigan.

And then in June, that old feeling of incompleteness started back again. On a sunny day when all looked so beautiful, the garden felt incomplete, the beach, the hills, the woods – they all felt incomplete. And vegetables and meat started to become very slightly blue and colours appeared in general a bit drained, like someone was forgetting to add red to the world. I felt unsafe from September to December but now it was a different feeling of being unsafe – the light felt brash and harsh and I could feel exposed and lost. So my ‘normal’ is to feel ‘incompleteness.’

As an adult I understand it. It is all about my perception. The world doesn’t change like I think it does. My perception does.

My experience has taught me to trust and taught me to have faith. These are the two things that are constant in my life. These things are unchanging.

Living with Spectral Sensitivity – Our only Constant is Change!

I have chosen the term ‘ambient colour sensitivity’ to describe mine and my son’s experience. I think this best describes our changing perception of colour which transforms how we momentarily perceive line, shape and pattern. Our experience changes the way we feel emotionally, feel in our bodies and the way we think. Our nervous system is also affected, confusing our brain and heightening our other sensitivities.

We have a feeling of incompleteness to our sensory experiences. A colour can suddenly appear too bright or too dull as if some hues are missing. A sound can suddenly feel harsh as if the softer tones are not there. A taste can suddenly be too sweet or too sour as if some elements of the flavour are absent. When we wear tints that give us a balanced perception of colour, our sensory experience feels constant.

When our colour perception is improved, ‘nothing is missing’. There is a feeling of completeness. On the basis of this discovery, some may say that we have Irlen Syndrome. However, whereas with Irlen syndrome, a person can usually find one or two tints to balance their perception of the spectrum on a constant basis, we are not able to do that. A few seconds, minutes or hours after we have found the right tint, we perceive the spectrum to have changed and can no longer wear the tints.

In short . . .

Whereas most people have sensory constants – where experiences can become familiar and predictable – we have no constants. Our only constant, therefore is change.

Whereas most people have a ‘complete’ sensory experience – where their brain does not question whether there is ‘something is missing’, our best version of completeness is learning to live with ‘incompleteness’.

We live by the light meaning that from when we get up the morning We have half an eye out to check what the light is doing. How we see the light affects all our choices of the day – what we wear, what we eat, what we do and how we relate to ourselves and other people.

I have chosen the term ‘ambient colour sensitivity’ to describe mine and my son’s experience. I think this best describes our changing perception of colour which transforms how we momentarily perceive line, shape and pattern. Our experience changes the way we feel emotionally, feel in our bodies and the way we think. Our nervous system is also affected, confusing our brain and heightening our other sensitivities.

We have a feeling of incompleteness to our sensory experiences. A colour can suddenly appear too bright or too dull as if some hues are missing. A sound can suddenly feel harsh as if the softer tones are not there. A taste can suddenly be too sweet or too sour as if some elements of the flavour are absent. When we wear tints that give us a balanced perception of colour, our sensory experience feels constant.

When our colour perception is improved, ‘nothing is missing’. There is a feeling of completeness. On the basis of this discovery, some may say that we have Irlen Syndrome. However, whereas with Irlen syndrome, a person can usually find one or two tints to balance their perception of the spectrum on a constant basis, we are not able to do that. A few seconds, minutes or hours after we have found the right tint, we perceive the spectrum to have changed and can no longer wear the tints.

In short . . .

Whereas most people have sensory constants – where experiences can become familiar and predictable – we have no constants. Our only constant, therefore is change.

Whereas most people have a ‘complete’ sensory experience – where their brain does not question whether there is ‘something is missing’, our best version of completeness is learning to live with ‘incompleteness’.

We live by the light meaning that from when we get up the morning We have half an eye out to check what the light is doing. How we see the light affects all our choices of the day – what we wear, what we eat, what we do and how we relate to ourselves and other people.

Let me show you how your relationship with the light can be your superpower!

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