Ambient Colour Therapy – How I can Help Your Sensitive Child

My Experience of being a Healer

Fourteen years ago, I was sitting in the hairdresser’s and something happened that changed the course of my life forever. I had felt passionate about being a healer for a long time but on this day when I was in my early thirties I started to realise something that I had ‘known’ on a subliminal level since I was a child.

On this day I became aware that I could ‘see’ people’s energy patterns. People were appearing to me as if they were ‘substantial’ or ‘insubstantial’ in certain areas of their body. I instinctively knew that this wasn’t related to their size or weight. I felt sure that it had something to do with how connected they were with themselves.

Going outside to walk home from the hairdressers’, I saw a lady walking towards me. I almost didn’t want to look at her, frightened of what I might ‘see’; but I did, and I felt that I could see right into her heart. I could ‘see’ and ‘feel’ her pain. I knew this wasn’t related to her countenance or posture, or to anything else that I could see with my ‘physical’ eyes. This depth of ‘seeing’ was something different to anything I had experienced before.

From that point on I knew I could either be scared of what I saw, or I could learn to understand it, hone it and use it wisely to help myself and others. Since this experience I’ve been working earnestly with my healing – learning how to connect with myself by letting go of what is blocking me from really being ‘in my body’ and ‘in the world’. I have learnt to interpret signs, symptoms and sensations as messages telling me what is happening in each area of my body and myself as a whole. This has helped me not just to heal but also to maintain my levels of contentment, energy and motivation, and to find my place in the world. And I help others to benefit from the same.

My Experience with the Light Spectrum

I have worked out all sorts of things about my experience of the light spectrum . . . why I often have such a buzzy brain, why I sometimes struggle to feel really connected to others, why I can manage the sound of the washing machine on spin some days and not other days, why I sometimes lose my taste, why I sometimes react to certain textures, why I love analysing things and containing things in boxes, why I love to follow my crazy intuitive thoughts as far as they will take me, why sometimes I love the rhythm of a drum and the waves of the sea and sometimes I can’t bear the feeling of them at all. I could go on and on and on. . . . because my anlaytical brain has taken me on a long journey to analyse how I process everything I see, hear, smell, taste, touch and feel.

But I don’t just have an analytical brain. I also have a very intuitive one and have learnt to use my feelings in my body, my thoughts and emotions as a reference point to how the light spectrum is affecting me on any day, in any moment. I see endless correlations between how I experience the light and feelings in my body, my senses, my thoughts and emotions. This has answered a lot of questions for me because I just didn’t know why I lived with so much change. I find understanding the pattern of the light spectrum and how it impacts me is comforting and empowering. It is challenging but I wouldn’t change it for anything.

How Can I Help Your Child?

Having an understanding of how connected I am or how disconnected in any moment (by seeing my own energy) and blending this with my understanding of how the light spectrum is affecting me, I have come to accept that we are not responsible for all the issues we may perceive ourselves to have. There is a bigger story at work. The challenge is knowing what it is possible to change and what we need to accept as out of our control.

I Can Help You:-

  1. Know whether your child has ambient colour sensitivity or not.
  2. Know whether your child’s issues are unresolved emotional / psychological trauma, ambient colour sensitivity or both.
  3. Understand your child’s own unique pattern of experiencing the light spectrum across the day and the seasons.
  4. Find ways to improve your child’s quality of life.

I Can Also Help Your Child: –

  1. Maximise their energy and motivation levels according to the light spectrum.
  2. Understand their changing moods and feeling states.
  3. Know when it is best to do physical activities and when best to contain their physical energy.
  4. Eat, dress and choose the right activities to match their changing perception of the light spectrum.
  5. Have the right space to live, breathe and work in.
  6. Know when best to go outside or stay inside.
  7. Gain a fresh understanding of any other sensitivities that they have.

My Approach

  • I understand that having extreme sensitivities can make both adults and children feel that it is very difficult to find help.
  • I understand that sensitive children often have a strong sense of knowing about what is right or not right for them when it comes to help.
  • I honour your child’s sensitivities as personal and precious to them.
  • I recognise that we interpret our own experience of the subtleties of life through our senses and help your child to understand and work with their patterns (recurring seasonal experiences,) rather than change them.
  • I believe lasting change can happen when we find the answers together. From a place of safety and acceptance we find we can make new connections in our brain. This opens the doorway to healing.

How I Work

Having ambient colour sensitivity brings with it a lack of constancy. Things don’t stay the same from one day to the next – colour, pattern, sound, how you feel, how you move, how you think. They are all constantly changing. For this reason, we often can’t help ourselves using standard therapies and exercises. We need to go deeper and work with our relationship with ourselves, others and the world.

In a session I will hear your child’s story and share mine. We will dig deep into the mystery of living by the light spectrum together.

Location
I work from my home in Crewkerne, Somerset. It is in a peaceful location off a quiet side-road.  If you are driving, parking is secure on our drive. if you are using the bus it is approximately 500 yards from the bus stop.

Space
I use a quiet, light, airy, comfortable room (no stairs). We have a pet free, smoke free home. Between sessions I wipe down all surfaces used with antibacterial wipes. Due to my sensitivities I am not able to wear a mask but you are welcome to wear one if it makes you feel more comfortable. If you have any special needs, please let me know and I will do my best to meet them.

I also am happy to work on-line using Skype or Zoom or another platform that you prefer. As there is a lot of conversation and interaction in this work, I finds this works very well. I ask you to keep a diary describing your experience of the light in detail and is easy to share this on screen

Training, qualifications & experience

Diploma in Hypnotherapy (DHP Acc. Hyp) with Hypnotic World

Bachelor of Education (BEd) with the University of Wales

Diploma in Childbirth Education (DipCBed) with Childbirth International.

What I Charge

I charge:-

£15 per half hour session – children up to 7

£30 per hour session – children 8 – 16

  • Please note that: –
  • The session lengths are just suggestions. I would be happy to give a longer session to a younger child or a shorter session to an older child.
  • All children up to age 16 need to be accompanied by an adult

I offer a FREE 20 minute initial chat on Skype, Zoom or Teams for you to ask any questions and to give us the chance to see if therapist and client are a good match.

Our CVI Family at the Seaside!

CVI stands for Cerebral Visual Impairment and it is the closest diagnosis we can find to the experience of ambient colour sensitivity that my son and I have.

To avoid brightness, UV and business, we decided to leave for the seaside at 8:00 am and as the sea is quite close to us, by 8:45 we found ourselves walking down the seafront of the popular Dorset town of Lyme Regis.

Previously I had carefully packed 3 rucksacks with cameras, binoculars, snacks and drinks and chosen the right colour coat for myself to wear on that day. Also I had to choose some combination of hat and brim to keep out the brightness and UV. My son was in his usual grey, and I was in my usual white bamboo trousers plus pink coat and the hat of the day which happened to be purple. My husband was in his usual blue shorts and white t-shirt. He would wear colour and pattern if we could only manage it.

We have 3 seats in the front of our car (an old Honda FRV) and my son sat with his phone and headphones listening to his techno music to block out the sound of the engine and the wheels on the road. I sat trying on tinted glasses to find the optimum pair for that day and my husband concentrated on driving!

When we reached Lyme Regis we went to our usual carpark and parked under our shady tree. We got out of the car and my son asked for his No.3 tints and I put a sunhat on his head. He went straight to find his camera (a big old DSLR one.) He put the strap over his head and straight away was taking a picture of two seagulls on a roof near to where we had parked. It was the sort of picture most people would miss, not thinking it was exciting enough. But not Luca. He finds the pictures others don’t see.

We paid for the carpark and then walked down the steep hill into Lyme town. I was commenting on how pleased I was with my new pink ski jacket. Yes, it was about 17 degrees and I was wearing a ski jacket! Temperature is not something I process easily. We walked down to the front and on a big wall from where we could see the whole beach laid out before us, I started to unpack my glasses! I had some prescription glasses, some purple glasses with prescription, and three different sets of polarising glasses. I was desperately looking for polarising glasses with the correct tint because I had realised that I couldn’t look at the colour or the movement of the sea. My son was becoming impatient wanting to move on but I knew I had to either find the right glasses or filter out the sea somehow. Having come to the seaside, that thought was depressing so I dug deeper into my bag. And I found a pair of pinkish purple polarising glasses. I put them on and Ahhhh, I could breathe! Everything just went calm and I looked at the sea and it had transformed from ugly and angry to beautiful and tranquil . Now I stood a chance of enjoying the rest of our trip.

Next I knew I mustn’t lose control of things when it comes to Luca. He has limited energy when we are out and if we walk too far, he might not have the energy to get home. We walked along the seafront and there were more seagull pictures to take. And Luca has a particularly clever way of tracking them and and keeping them in focus as they move across the sky. Everyone was happy . .

My husband has a way of being drawn towards the Cob that juts out into the sea, like a bee to a honey pot. But this always means a longer walk and always means going through the business and clutter to get there. Suddenly there is sand and cafes and lots of people, meaning lots of clutter, noise and smells. And yes, once again we found ourselves drawn towards the Cob. And once more I wasn’t happy! I started walking faster which is always code for ‘I want to get out of here quickly!’ so we found a quiet side street and I immediately felt that I could breathe again. And there on a wall nestled between the rooves was a seagull’s nest with a parent looking after their young, so my son was happy now too!

So what was next? Hunger, of course. I suddenly realised I needed a snack so we headed down to the pebbles as my son doesn’t like the sand and, as I said, the beach was too busy. We spread out our picnic blanket and I got out my sandwich. My husband got out his little pack of Nairn’s chocolate oat biscuits. Then my son said “You can’t eat those!” He doesn’t like the smell of chocolate or strawberry jam. I looked around and you could see beach for a good quarter of a mile in both directions! “Can’t Luca move from the smell?” I wondered. I broached the subject but he said he was tired and he had nothing to sit on. And also that he wouldn’t eat his sandwich on the beach because last time he was harassed by a seagull! So our snack became a quick bite and then we needed to find shade away from the beach. By now moods were lowering and I was feeling disappointed. Why hadn’t I thought to bring 2 picnic blankets?

By the time we had walked to the top of the park that backs onto the beach and found some shade, the day was getting hot and the UV levels were getting higher. I was starting to feel the affects of the light spectrum in my nervous system, especially my hands and arms. Now I just wanted to get home. We had been out too long. We had walked a little too far. We had got a little too hot and there was a little too much visual clutter. We quickly found our escape route from Lyme – a pretty alley-way between cottages that leads nearly back to the carpark. On the way, I managed to share my disappointment and receive some solace from my trusty team. At the end of the alley-way, there was just one more hill to climb – the steep one we had so happily come down on our way into the town. This was one too many hills for my son.

Having made it back to the carpark, the car was nice and cool. It was 10:3o am. Lots of people were arriving for their day at the beach and we were glad to be going home from our hour at the beach! We started the drive home. My son said “That was good. It was a bit difficult but I think it was worth it!” That was all I needed to hear! I breathed a sigh of relief.

Living with CVI is one challenge after another. And just when you think you have completed all the trouble shooting you need to do, something changes. It could be the season, weather, or time of day all affecting how you perceive the colours, line, shape, edges and movement around you. In fact you have no constants. When you have ambient colour sensitivity, your only constant is change.

To read more about living with ambient colour sensitivity – a type of CVI – please take a look at my book.

Expression is a Joy When You Can Connect

My son and I experience the spectrum differently to most people which affects the way we connect.

From January to the end of March I am struggling to see and feel enough blue light. I find it hard to process my own thoughts and what other people are saying. My 12 year old son keeps talking to me about his programming projects but unless I really focus and try super hard to understand by asking questions, the information feels like a blur to me. It struggles to get into my brain!

Then suddenly at the end of March, it as if the fog lifts. I can see and hear more clearly. However, rather ironically, when I see enough blue, my son stops seeing it. I ‘see’ this as a strained vacant expression in his eyes. He also becomes less hands on with things and appears less connected in his feet. I know he wants to take an interest in other people but he really finds it impossible to listen to any of my ramblings or suggestions! He is better playing with his friends online where the fun, humour and creativity manage to jump the gap between his desire and ability to connect.

At first when my son starts to struggle to connect, I feel all sorts of feelings – annoyance, anger and disappointment. But when I ‘get’ it, I realise these feelings are misplaced. My son is already in pain – feeling the pain of struggling to connect. He doesn’t need me adding to that. I have to accept him as he is, be patient and wait to hear his bright voice and see his quirky smile again. This will only happen when the light is more favourable for him. And lets hope that by then, it hasn’t become less favourable for me!

Being Highly Sensitive – Our Only Constancy is Rhythm and Pattern

I don’t have colour constancy so my brain is always trying to decide what colour something is. Are my pink trousers really pink today or are they red or are they orange? They haven’t changed much from yesterday but there is some subtle change to the hue which alerts my brain that I am now seeing a different colour.

I don’t have sound constancy so my brain is always trying to decide what sound something it. My heater is clicking in the corner of my room. Is it the same click as yesterday? Or is it slightly brighter, duller, louder, quieter? Again, not much change from yesterday but my brain still has this insatiable curiosity about the quality of sound.

I don’t have touch constancy so my brain is always trying to decide how something feels. Every day I touch the cushions on my settee and my brain wonders if they feel the same as yesterday. Are they a little softer, a little too soft, a little harsher? Again not much change from yesterday but my brain cannot help itself but ask the questions.

And then there is smell. Do the chips cooking smell the same as yesterday? And taste? Do my chips taste the same as yesterday? Yes, my brain will not be happy if it hasn’t considered these things.

Exhausting – you must think! Well, yes it is! But I have a solution.

I need to work out what the pattern is. How does my cushion feel in January, February, March . . . ? What does the kitchen tap sound like and how does it make me feel in January, February, March . . . ? What colour is my strawberry jam in January, February, March . . .?

Then when that time of year comes round again, I won’t be shocked. I will be expecting each variation of the stimuli as I move through the year. Constancy, any way you can get it, is comforting. Lack of constancy is disturbing and makes us feel insecure.

I don’t have constancy for any of my sensitivities so the only thing constant in my life is rhythm and pattern.

It’s Harder for Some of Us to See Out and for Others to See In.

I have wondered my whole life why my face appears so unrelaxed when I catch sight of myself in a mirror. And it is more than this – it is as if I am struggling to connect through my eyes. There is just the odd occasion when I look in the mirror and think ‘Oh, there you are, so you do exist after all!’

Now I know that it all has to do with my difficulty in always perceiving enough blue light. I am not talking about violet or green or any other colour – no, specifically blue. I always have this feeling at this time of year from half way through February to the beginning of April. I discern enough violet light (I know that because my brain is so active, intuitive and creative,) but I am struggling to perceive blue light. I know this because I can feel quite alone and struggle to be a team player.

As I see my own and other people’s energy, I am able to find clues to connection and disconnection, that others may not have. When I perceive too little blue light, I literally see a band of low energy going across my eyes. I find myself trying to connect with people through eye contact but not really feeling the connection I want. I feel open-hearted, but it is amazing how cut off you can feel when you struggle to connect through your eyes.

I have to learn other ways to connect – voice, feelings, touch, smell, taste, movement – whilst I am waiting for the blue light to come back!

My Power Comes from Imbalance, not Balance!

I wanted to be balanced – I really did – but that is not my destiny.

I live in a nearly continuous state of imbalance because of my reaction to the light spectrum. In fact, if the light ever feels balanced, I feel quite lost and don’t know what to do with myself!

Today for instance – another cloudy rainy day in the UK. Thankfully I perceive enough blue light to feel open hearted. However, I don’t feel grounded (low red light), I always have my friend, the violet light, though, energising, inspiring and pushing me on to higher and greater things.

I can do much with my perception of violet light. I can get to the heart of things and put on my analytical creative hat. I can work with data and make deductions and build theories. I wouldn’t become the crazy analyst if the light was balanced. I am pretty sure I would be doing something a lot more mundane!

Balance is nice if you can get it but maybe a little ordinary. It is imbalance that leads you into the extra-ordinary and and if you hold its hand, it will take you on the most exciting journey!

I Don’t Get to Choose How I Connect Each Day

Having studied all the emotional psychological connections with what I feel in my body, that I can, plus all my reactions to the way I see the spectrum, I am now convinced that I don’t get to choose how I connect each day.

I thought I could heal and become all things I wanted – to be open- hearted, enjoy intimacy, give my gifts to world, have a strong powerful voice, follow my vision, be happy to be vulnerable, work with my cycles and rhythms and find where I belong.

And I have achieved all these things to a point. But it wasn’t the point I was dreaming of! I thought if I could become whole, I could just get on with things!

But wholeness isn’t all about me. I can’t be whole by myself. It isn’t possible. So God made me really sensitive to the light spectrum just to make sure I knew that!

But, ever ambitious, I have had a similar attitude with the light spectrum, almost expecting to be able to outsmart my reaction to it. After all, if I don’t perceive enough blue light, then I just need to be a bit more open-hearted. If I don’t perceive enough red light, then I just need to be more aware of my physical connection with the world

But how far can this new insight take me, I wondered?

If I just open my heart, could I get on the next plane to the Middle East and help refugees?

If I just let in trillions of support, could I foster a houseful of children?

If I do everything I can to make myself feel really secure, could I jump out of a plane?

Aaaargghhh!! NO, I CAN’T

I can heal myself, which I have done, but now I have to be part of the world. I don’t perceive enough red light in February so I don’t even feel grounded enough to bake a batch of biscuits, let alone jump out of a plane! I can’t make myself feel grounded. I can only do things that help to give me a greater feeling of security.

I can’t make myself feel anything. I can only be open to feeling. I don’t get to choose how I can connect each day!

Anxiety – Does it all Really Come from Within?

If you had asked me the question – “Does all anxiety come from within?” a few years ago I would have said “Yes” without hesitation. And as a result of thinking this, I have had a lot of therapy and worked long and hard with my self development, expecting to resolve my insecure anxious feelings and thoughts.

A Story

Today I woke up feeling bright and breezy and decided it would be a good day to go with my family to a small seaside town and play mini-golf. Now, for our complicated family, it is amazing to just get out of the door, let alone make it down to the beach and participate in an activity! But I felt the light was good, my energy felt good and it was worth giving it a try.

As soon as I decided to go out, I felt my anxiety levels raise. I started thinking about all the things we needed – rucksacks, juice, chocolate, tissues, paracetemol . . .! I then told myself that this was just like any trip for us. We would take the same things for an appointment at the hairdressers! So I relaxed a bit. But I noticed I still didn’t feel as grounded as I had felt when I first got up. My legs were a bit achy and physical tasks like carrying things around the house were starting to feel difficult. I then realised the light had changed – I was perceiving less red light than when I first woke up. I wondered if I still really felt like going out. But of course, with a 12 year old who is excited about the prospect of mini-golf by the seaside, you don’t really get a choice. With the suggestion comes a commitment!

So . . I committed and off we went! When we arrived, I felt the same as I had done at home – happy, pleased to be alive but ungrounded. How does this feel? Well . . it feels like my legs aren’t as substantial as the rest of me. This feeling used to make me feel insecure but it doesn’t any more because I recognise it and understand it. At the seaside today, I knew I was safe and all was well and it was this knowing that I depended on. The real give away with how my perception of the light affected me, was just how much my legs ached when I had to climb lots of steps to get to the golf course. I felt as if I had run a marathon in the last 3 days, it was so painful. Also, when the energy is low in my legs, I have a tendency to pull muscles in my knees so I have to be super careful how I I use my legs and the rest of my body.

At the mini-golf I felt just OK. When you don’t feel grounded, it is harder to feel more than OK sometimes. it takes a distraction like seeing an amazing gull or getting a hole in one to feel more than OK. This feeling of just being OK can raise the alarm that something isn’t right but I am used to the feeling now and just stay calm and go with it. As I say, I know I am safe and that all is well.

My son, who is 12, has a similar experience to me. As he is a child and not always thinking rationally, small things can knock him off balance emotionally, and have massive impact on him physically. After the game of golf, we decided to go to the fish shop which was at the bottom of a very steep hill. I could see the pain on my son’s face as he walked down the hill, and the fear in his eyes that he might not make it back to the car. I remember this feeling so well from when I was a child. I would sometimes feel that I could not walk another step. But there is nothing wrong with our legs. Having rested a little on the drive home, my son got out the car and ran to check on his pet doves. I just got on with life as normal.

Not being grounded and having low energy in our legs does affect our daily life but it affects us much more when we try to go out and have some fun!

Anxiety definitely doesn’t always come from within. Sometimes we don’t know what is affecting us. We just know we don’t feel right.