Hi, Welcome to my Blog! I have always liked music, art and dance and felt these needed to be part of my life. However sometimes I just haven’t felt that I could direct my energy into these passions in the way I wanted to. To try to practice an instrument, paint or dance would seem to make me feel uncomfortable, hot and stressed.
Then this year (2017) already knowing I was highly sensitive, I discovered that my greatest sensitivity is to light and colour. For part of the year in the brightest months I am struggling to think clearly, to make sense of pattern and am battling with various symptoms affecting my nervous system. This is partly related to the brightness of the light but also to my perception of colour. As the day progresses from morning to night and the seasons develop and the weather changes so do the colours. And although this might not be a problem for some, for me it definitely is. I don’t like all the colours I see, just as I don’t like all the sounds I hear or all the textures I feel. A colour can grate on me like a feeling of rough bark can disturb someone sensitive to touch. It can make me feel tight in my chest or hot or ungrounded just to name a few of the symptoms I experience.
So . . I had to rethink my life! I cleared a lot of my clothes and our home of all the colours that might disturb. I gave away a lot of my art materials. And then I paused for thought! Is this a sign telling me to focus on my music, I wondered. Tones – they are colourful. Rhythms – they have pattern – but is it a kind of colour and pattern that doesn’t disturb because it is more constant and doesn’t change with every fleeting cloud? Well, I don’t think so because my experience of tones and rhythms are still affected by my perception of light and colour. Hmm, well maybe I should be a dancer? No, I have a charge of energy zinging in me most of the time. I can rarely add movement of any complexity to my constant buzz!
Oh, so who am I then? What shall i do?
Be the healer of course – who I was born to be . . . and stop trying to hide behind everything else!!
I hope you find my blog helpful and please feel free to contact me or write comments. I love to hear from you.