Here are 3 ways to help you and/or your highly sensitive child feel better when they’re feeling distressed, anxious or just jangled.
It is important to remember that when we have felt ‘jangled’ we need to drink in from the world to feel better. The following activities are ones where we can just ‘be. We don’t need to ‘give’ and we don’t need to ‘achieve’. We need to explain this to our children because our tendency is often to be doing things for a ‘big’ reason and our children pick this up and feel that everything must be very significant. It is up to to us to show them that we can just ‘be’.
There are lots of ways we can ‘be’ to help ourselves feel better when have felt ‘jangled’and here are some of them.
When we have been in a busy environment like shopping or to the hairdressers we will have been open to all sorts of stimulus – sound, visual, bodily sensations, smells and feelings of our own and those of other people. As highly sensitive it is usual to feel ‘phased’ after this sort of outing.
WHAT CAN WE DO?
Have a bath and do lots of pouring of water.
Change your clothes (that may feel charged with the outing) and wear something comforting.
Spend time with animals.
Play with sand, pebbles or stones.
Go in the garden.
Go for a walk.
Walk/play in the rain.
These things will all calm you and/or your child down. They feel refreshing and revitalising.
When we have been in an environment where we don’t feel that we have had the right kind of stimulation we can end up feeling under-stimulated which makes us feel out of sorts.. This may be when we have been with people who don’t inspire us or we have been doing something that doesn’t feel creative or deep feeling enough for us.
WHAT CAN WE DO?
Play with water – make bubbles, play water flutes, splash, pour and spray water.
Play with marbles – making sounds by running our hand over the marbles, rolling marbles together, pouring marbles onto a tea towel (to prevent too much noise!).
Play with shells – put them in water and move them with your hands. Look at the colours.
Play with sand and pebbles – pouring and shaking using tubes and containers.
Play with water beads, running them through your hands in water.
Play with images. Look up favourite pictures of something on google images. Watch a TV programme that inspires creativity – cooking, art, gardening, sewing, pottery etc.
Play with fabric. Make up simple playful stories using inspiration from different coloured pieces of felt.
Listen to inspiring but relaxing music.
Energetic outdoor play e.g. football, tennis, skipping, jumping.
These ways to ‘be’ will all help you and/or your child to feel more energised and will lift your mood.
FEELINGS / INFORMATION OVERLOAD
When we have taken on a lot of information for instance have been looking up things on the internet (or writing blog posts!), we can feel a bit ‘phased’ and as if our brains are on ‘full’. When we have been with people who are struggling with life and exuding negativity we can feel a bit ‘phased’ and as if our hearts or on ‘full’.
WHAT CAN WE DO?
Anything that is rhythmic and stimulates the senses:-
Helping with simple things in the home.
Planting seeds / Weeding a flower bed.
Listening to gentle, rhythmic music.
Rhythmic outdoor play (not too energetic!) e.g. catch, badminton, swingball.
These ways to ‘be’ will help you and/or your child to find your state of equilibrium. The clutter of the information or feeling of overload will have a chance to settle and re-organise itself. You will feel refreshed and your thinking will become clear again.
TWO PEOPLE – DIFFERENT NEEDS?
If you and your child are feeling different things – one is over stimulated and one is under-stimulated then you could meet in the middle by doing rhythmic things. My son asked for marbles in water the other day and I found the sound and the movement unbearable so I managed to persuade him to make patterns with beads around the table instead.. I felt so much better and he was happy too 🙂
WHEN WE’VE HAD A VERY JANGLY DAY!
When we we wake up tired from ‘the jangles’ of the day before sometimes we need to de-jangle ourselves all day long. We limit screen time more than we usually do and move between the ‘3 dejanglers’ all day. That way we regain our sense of balance without feeling that we have had to have a day of rest or nothing which can be boring and lead to low mood, motivation and energy.
It is all about finding the ‘right kind’ of stimulation! Happy De-jangling!